If you’re following our weekly podcast, you know that the StatrDraft team have been playing a prototype version of the game for over a decade now. Tempting and all as it would be to bang on and on about who (me) is currently in what (1st) position, it’s time we had a look back at the start of the season – Draft Night. The night of all nights, as coaches come together to hum their own tactical tunes into the fantasy football symphony that is a completed Draft. Rather than a deep dive on the finished picture, today we’re taking a look at the first round pick – the player every coach hopes will be the standard-bearer for their squad for 38 weeks. And, with ours being a ten coach league, we’ll take a look at who worked out the best and which picks were just insane. Which were lucky, who should have been picked up sooner, who was cursed…. first up, 10th place.
10. Solanke (TOT – F)
Moyrosstitutes, a returning club of old, were stuck in the nasty ninth so it was never going to be a Haaland or a Salah, but to take on a clearly-overhyped transfer headliner player and leave Isak, Alexander-Arnold, Mbeumo and Cunha on the table was just an inexplicable move. Sure, if young Dominic had lived up to his expected potential, it might have been a different season for both the Moyrosstitutes and Spurs. This may have been a case of heart ruling head, as our Joey is a lifelong Spurs man and even he couldn’t have foreseen the angst of Ange as the season progressed. It’s forgivable, but absolutely an error, and not even in retrospect. Solanke is currently the 117th player overall for the year and only likely to head further downwards, totalling 195 points and 8 per week at time of writing. He’s also not even the second highest scoring forward for Spurs. Verdict : hard oops.
9. Foden (MCI – M)
Picked seventh – and in defence of Draft Punk, on auto pick because someone was too busy to draft – , this decision came off the back of a season that ended with Phil starting ahead of even a healthy Kevin De Bruyne, and hauling hard towards the end of the season. Pep’s decision to play him as a supporting centre forward after Easter drove him up the YTD table and into our Damo’s squad. So what went wrong? Well, for starters, City’s midfield is more crowded than Old Trafford these days. The OOP points bonanza was short lived, as all things returned to Haaland as target man for the first part of the season, and Foden was once again reduced to competing with the almighty De Bruyne for game time. And City, as a whole, are scoring fewer goals for reasons we’ll get into below, meaning lower returns on lower returns. 227 year to date, healthily over the 9 points per game but simply not playing enough.
8. Son (TOT – F)
The mighty Jolly Rogers, coached by our self-proclaimed “best Drafter Evar” Dermot, took on son as their first pick. And there’s logic there. Son has never been anything other than consistent at Spurs for many years, and is a nailed-on favourite here at Statr. So what’s the catch? Well, again, it’s the Spurs problem this season in that they are Very Very Not Good. As well as this, since Kane’s departure, son has been playing a little deeper to allow more tactical input now that he’s inherited the captain’s armband. It’s the Ozil conundrum – he’s the guy that assists the assist, so he’ll still get decent points from our system (even if it’s DM level death next door). 20th YTD, a healthy 11 points per game despite playing on an objectively shit team, this one maybe bad fortune rather than bad picking but there’s just a whiff of lack of preparedness from it.
7. Saka (ARS – M)
Dave’s Kinder Mbeumo were absolutely hexed on this one. After the entirely predictable first pick (more on that below), Dave was left with a choice that anyone drafting knew they’d have to make in second spot: Saka or Salah? Well, going on last year’s points and points per game, Saka was the right choice. Nobody really thought Salah would do what he did this season, so Saka was at the time absolutely the correct choice. Early picks tend towards high predictability and there’s usually a big 3-5 that simply have to go early.
So why was it a bad pick? It wasn’t. It was just shitty luck that Bukayo was injured for so much of the season. See, sometimes you can have all your ducks lined up and make the right move, but the injury fairy will sprinkle little flakes of piss-soaked glitter on your parade. Sorry Dave. You backed the wrong horse.
6. Watkins (AVL – F)
Oh Kim. It’s just not your year is it? Kylian Me Softly are firmly last, and likely to finish the season on fewer points than Southampton. The thing about Watkins is – English media hype aside, for a moment – if he was a first round pick Villa would have been y’know, good when he was their entire strike force. He’s top 20 and likely to head downwards further as Unai realises just how much fun it is to play “transfer market” out front. Solid second or third round pick, sure. But what was left on the table was absolutely disgraceful. Mbeumo? Isak? Bruno? Nah, I’ll take Watkins, thanks. No no, don’t want to bother anyone by winning games. Seeya.
5. Palmer (CHE – M)
Was it ballsy? No. Was it inspired? No. Has he been bad? Not really. But Cole Palmer Year Two is a very different story to last season, and as the Craggy Naggins have discovered this year, lightning rarely strikes that hard twice. Ultimately it wasnt injury, or inconsistency, or lack of game time that sent Palmer down to 3rd overall this year (behind Aristocrats attacking duo, Salah and Mbeumo). If anything he’s been back on an upwards trajectory for the past few weeks. No, it’s because Chelsea Football Club are absolute nonsense. Not bad. Not good. Nonsense. It’s chaos. Spending fortunes on contracts for players that don’t do anything, a bursting-at-the-seams squad, heavy rotation out front…poor Cole is easily confused. And where’s his buddy Nick been? So why is this pick so low? Because our Gary should have recognised a one-season-wonder when he saw one.
4. Haaland (MCI – F)
It wasn’t supposed to be this way for the Old Republic. They’re in need of 9 points from their remaining 3 games to have any chance of making the playoffs, due in no small part to an over-reliance on the oversized man-baby Viking that is Erling “humble” Haaland. And sure, had he not gone through an almost unbelievable run of missed shots it might have been the most obvious and necessary pick ever. See, not picking Haaland would have been adventurous, as well as arguably insane, given his track record. The problem then would have continued for the next coach, all the way down. He’s an almost unignorable asset, no matter how hard we all try. So yes, Deano did the correct thing. Armed with the power of hindsight however, ditching Haaland out of Red Devil spite might have served him better. The precarious first pick has to be an absolute stormer, given that Snake draft means double importance as there’s no going again until another 20 players are off the board. Haaland sits seventh overall, and unlikely to play more than a couple more games this season. Hard luck Deano. Perhaps you and Pep will both finish fifth this season.
3. Fernandes (MUN – M)
Now, it’s rare that I praise anything Bilbao Baggins have done all season, given their recent form merely compensating for a lacklustre draft and poor first half. But Fernandes is exactly what any coach should be looking for. Attacking involvement? Absolutely. Nailed on? Totally. Track record? You betcha. So why wasn’t he taken until the 6th pick? Well, because of that awkward club crest beside his name. You know, the one that says “I’m playing for a shit squad in hard times”. Having the foresight to grab the shining star in a pile of muck is exactly what great drafting is all about, and our Jon did himself proud with this one. Fernandes is, despite United’s ongoing woes, the 4th highest scoring player for the season. If he’s there next season, he should be ranked in every coach’s sights ahead of (almost, see below) any other player. Nicely done indeed, to overcome a mucky middle draft pick.
2. Isak (NEW – F)
League newcomers SpitOnThatHwang led by our plucky newbie Jak landed the double-edged sword in draft order. Tenth place is a curse, because the (presumably) best 9 players are gone. The up side? You get the 11th pick as well. Jak frankly did great on both, ignoring the mis-steps and blunders, staying cool, and carefully picking Newcastle’s jewel in the crown (No, not Schar) before proceeding to sweep up Crystal Palace’s Eze. Brilliant work in a tricky slot from the first-timer, given that Isak is sitting 5th for the year and showing no signs of slowing. 14 points per game, nailed on, playing in front of a great team having a good season – you couldn’t ask for much more than that. Well, not much more….
1. Salah (LIV – F)
It’s all been said at this point, hasn’t it? Let’s say it again. The highest scoring in StatrDraft. The most goals. The most assists. The best per-game return. A nigh-unbeatable team. Absolute nailedonity. Drive. Skill. Experience.
And a hell of a lot of luck for your humble writer. Mo is playing for the Aristocrats this season, for one reason and one reason only – draft order. Yes, Deano had to pick Haaland first. Yes, I can see the logic of Dave picking Saka next (and frankly, I was tempted by the same, assuming Salah would be gone by the time I got him in 3rd position). And sure, third pick is usually enough for an S-tier player. But nobody could have predicted that he would top last season’s top overall score before March. I had a very obvious choice in front of me, and I didn’t try to get clever or creative, or pick a Brighton player for loyalty, or grab a sleeper, or pick up an early goalie. I made the right pick at the right time, and it’s worked out beautifully.
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