Let’s be honest: We’re barely into autumn and already the table looks like it’s been written by a drunk AI. Arsenal are out on top, cruising through the chaos, while the rest of the league is serving up pure sitcom energy. Tottenham are third with four points from four home games. Bournemouth sold all their defenders and are somehow second. And Sunderland? Just out here treating the Premier League like a freshers’ five-a-side league. Welcome to the 2025/26 season.
So with long throws coming back and the return of the bigman whose gameplans are no longer working, here’s our StatrDraft breakdown of the current state of managerial peril, panic, and popcorn fuelled entertainment.
19=) Mikel Arteta (Arsenal)
From ‘bald fraud’ memes to a potential 100-point season. Arteta is the kid in class who actually read the homework brief. His Arsenal side are relentless, well-drilled and, crucially, not self-destructing every third week. They’ve cashed in on fixtures while Liverpool and City dropped points, and the squad has finally learned how to win ugly. It’s kind of all they do really. No chance he’s going anywhere unless he royally fucks it. Either he wins the league by 10 or combusts gloriously. There is no in-between.
The only thing threatening Arteta’s job is Arteta.
19=) Régis Le Bris (Sunderland)
Sunderland have been nothing short of brilliant under Le Bris. They’re fearless, smart in possession, and tactically well-drilled. Xhaka gives me a chubb every time I watch him play. Even losing at Old Trafford hasn’t rattled the momentum. They’ve already exceeded points totals from some relegated sides last season, and they’ve shown they belong. Unless PSG come knocking tomorrow, Régis is safe. And let’s be real—Forest and Wolves have far more pressing issues. They also spent a wedge of dosh in the summer.
The hipster choice turned top-tier overachiever. Five wins already. More points than Southampton got in all of last season. The wheels will probably fall off, but until then, they are safe.
17=) Thomas Frank (Tottenham)
Frank walked into a hot mess and made it lukewarm with potential. Spurs are decent but inconsistent. They look like they’re between ideas: De-Anged defensively but still prone to his chaotic tendencies in attack. The Nuno could come lurking, but he’s not quite on the chopping block yet. He’ll need to sort the home form soon though, or the November international break might come with some questions.
Still, no fire drill just yet. But that home form? Woeful. If they can sort out their attack they could be onto something.
17=) Eddie Howe (Newcastle)
Howe’s stock is wobbling. He brought silverware and Champions League football, but this season has been underwhelming. The Isak saga hasn’t helped and the Magpies’ form has been patchy at best. Newcastle fans are loyal but that loyalty comes with high expectations now. The pressure’s rising, and a couple of poor results could have the narrative shift fast, a dodgy start has our spidey-sense tingling. You don’t stay four points outside the top six for long on Tyneside without someone whispering “sack him”. And now Brendan Rogers is available, there’s a bang of Newcastle of him isn’t there?
14=) Enzo Maresca (Chelsea)
Maresca has been riding the wave of Club World Cup glory and the odd “statement win,” but the cracks are showing. Losing to Sunderland and United has fans grumbling again. The age profile of the squad is a question once again. There’s still hope when Chelsea click, they look like contenders, but if the inconsistency doesn’t sort itself out soon, the Maresca Out brigade will find their voices again. He’s safe… for now.
14=) Andoni Iraola (Bournemouth)
One of the most rated coaches in the league. Lost key players, was expected to crumble, but somehow has Bournemouth playing champagne football on a tap water budget. He’s mid-table here purely because someone had to be, but we’re not buying it. Iraola isn’t going anywhere unless it’s to a bigger job.
14=) Unai Emery (Aston Villa)
Emery’s had one of the most confusing arcs of the season. Started looking shaky, went winless for weeks, but has bounced back with some serious results. He’s back in the good books for now but there’s a whiff of fragility around Villa. If they fall off again, this could spiral. Emery’s not in immediate danger, but he knows better than most how quickly things change.
Four wins on the bounce. But a reminder that just a month ago, Villa were circling the plughole. Emery’s safe for now but has to prove this isn’t just a hot streak.
10=) Fabian Hurzeler (Brighton)
Brighton are so Brighton it hurts. Beat City, lose to Wolves. It’s classic Hurzeler-ball: tactically slick but just chaotic enough to keep everyone guessing. His job’s safe, but the mid-table mediocrity won’t fly forever. Needs to find consistency or at least a striker who can stay fit.
10=) David Moyes (Everton)
Moyes has somehow turned Everton into a strong-but-lovable side again. The new stadium buzz is real, and Jack Grealish looks reborn. But this is Everton, and they’ve blown up good vibes before. For now, Moyes is cruising, but two injuries and a VAR disaster could swing the pendulum.Beat Palace dramatically. Then got humbled by City and Spurs. Mid-table meh.
10=) Pep Guardiola (Man City)
He’s not getting sacked, ever. But could he just quit? Walk away like a Bond villain after one final masterplan? Possibly. He looks agitated, bored at times, and the chase for Arsenal might be his last dance. Still, Pep is more secure than Fort Knox.
10=) Keith Andrews (Brentford)
Was meant to steady the ship post-Frank and instead has Brentford flying. Wins over Liverpool and United have fans dreaming, but the thin squad could unravel if injuries pile up. He’s earned time and praise, and unless they go full Leeds, Andrews isn’t in trouble.From internal promotion to out-performing expectations. Not bad for a club held together by spreadsheets.
7=) Oliver Glasner (Crystal Palace)
One of the most tactically impressive managers in the league. Palace punch way above their weight, and Glasner’s a big reason why. He won’t get sacked but if another club poaches him, Palace could be scrambling. It’s less sack watch, more keep-an-eye-on-other-clubs watch.
7=) Ruben Amorim (Manchester United)
The knives were out early doors, but Amorim has weathered the storm with some key wins. United look better, he looks more settled, and even the fans have stopped screaming about Bayindir (for now). He’s not fully out of the woods but he’s got breathing room. For now.
We were calling him doomed two weeks ago. Now he’s won at Anfield and smashed Brighton. Everything’s fine. For now.
7=) Scott Parker (Burnley)
It’s been… mixed. Big wins against direct rivals, heavy defeats against the big boys. Burnley look like they could stay up, but it’s tight and they won’t. Parker needs consistency especially at home. For now, the wins have bought him time, but he’s still on the edge.
5=) Arne Slot (Liverpool)
Three weeks ago, Slot was a tactical genius. Now? He’s spiralling. Throwing tantrums at refs, melting down post-match, and suddenly looking more like Moany Slot in all the wrong ways. A few more losses and it stops being funny. He needs a result soon, or this could turn ugly fast.
From hero to headloss in three weeks.
5=) Marco Silva (Fulham)
Fulham are skidding toward crisis territory, a few mixed result early doors took the wind firmly out of the sails. Four losses on the bounce, nothing going right, and Silva looks like a man who’s already had the conversation with his agent. There’s still time but Wolves this weekend feels massive. Lose that, and the knives are out.
Talked about for other jobs, now he’s lost four on the bounce. Wolves next. That could be his stay of execution.
4) Daniel Farke (Leeds)
The promotion hero tag has worn off, and fast. Leeds are learning that the Premier League doesn’t care about what you did in the Championship. He still has goodwill but a few more stinkers like Burnley and it’ll be gone. Needs to find points, fast.
That Burnley defeat was brutal. A win over West Ham helped, but you can feel the patience wearing thin. If the bounce ends, so might his tenure.
3) Sean Dyche (Nottingham Forest)
Lol just in the job but already near the top to get binned. Brought in to fix the Angeball hangover, and will immediately start grunting his way to results. But this is Forest, and their owner would sack Mother Teresa if she dropped points. Dyche needs to show progress quickly or face being the 87th manager of the Marinakis era.
Forest’s form is dire and the upcoming fixtures look nasty. The owner isn’t exactly known for patience…
2) Nuno Espírito Santo (West Ham)
Already on job #2 of the season and somehow still not safe. West Ham look directionless, brittle at the back, and short of ideas. If the next few games don’t click, he could genuinely be sacked twice in four months. That’s a record even Watford would admire.
Could make it a historic double if things keep going south.
1) Vítor Pereira (Wolves)
It’s tradition. Wolves sack a manager in November. Pereira knows it. The fans know it. His own nan probably knows it. The results are bad, the vibes worse, and unless they suddenly pull out three wins from nowhere, it’s curtains. Especially if he gets another red card for “irresponsible behaviour in the technical area.”
Rock bottom. Terrible start. Raging on the touchline like a man who’s been asked to manage with 10 cones and a whistle. He’s toast unless results change fast.
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